July post - catching up

We're now half way through July!

The last week of June and the first week of July were really rough on me. It was pretty much nonstop anxiety and panic attacks. I was having extreme pain in my ovary. It felt like I was walking around with a knife stuck in it, and every time I moved, the knife jabbed and turned. To add to this, my cycles have been all over the place - one cycle was three weeks, and two weeks after I got that period, I got my next one. I was terrified that my ovary was rupturing (something I didn't even know could happen prior to this past January!) or a tumor was growing from it, or cancer had come back. I was a mess.

I called up the doctor after four days of the pain with no signs of it going away. Five days after that, I went in for a check up and ultrasound. They couldn't find anything wrong with my ovary, and said both ovary and uterus were fine. They didn't even see any cysts.. There was an assistant doctor there, and my doctor explained my whole story, from tumor, cancer, miscarriage, ectopic, and the fact that I'm missing half of my reproductive parts and only have one ovary and uterus left in there. He finished by saying "and she has children! Isn't that amazing?" Sometimes I forget that it IS amazing and my kids really are miracles. My body has been through so much, but it's also exceeded all expectations and did more than any doctor ever thought it would. He acknowledged that, understandably, it does come with the cost of medical paranoia and anxiety.

He couldn't answer the pain problem, but I think it's a severely strained or torn muscle and ligaments. It's been three weeks and the pain is still there. Heating pads and careful working is getting me through the day. I haven't been able to pick up the kids or run around for nearly a month.

In business news, I'm expanding. My angel store is doing well, but I feel like it can do much better if I push it. I'm going to be opening a second store that features babies for welcome baby gifts, baby showers, etc. as I've had so many people tell me that I should do it, that I am!

In addition, I'm going to start reaching out to my community. I'm going to ask local hospitals if they'd like to stock my items, and seek out local stores and stand opportunities. There's a new farmer's market that is literally across the street from my house. If I could get the town's approval to set up a table there with my angels and babies, I could just carry it across the street. It would be easy enough to check in on the kids, and get Bill to exchange with me during bathroom breaks, and get some food from home. It would be ideal, so I'm going to make a bunch of babies and ask for permission to set up. If I can sell just 5 babies each month, I can afford Katie's ballet tuition, all of her extra ballet costs, pay for gifts at holidays and birthdays, expand my business further, keep the charity going, and maybe put away a few dollars into savings (the last one is stretching it though!)

If opening a second business, prepping to set up at a stand each weekend, calling/emailing/visiting businesses, running a charity, homeschooling the kids and keeping up a house wasn't enough work, I'm also doing Camp Nanowrimo - a month full of writing where I need to write at least 2-3 thousand words a day. Today is exactly two weeks into it, and I have 30,000 words - half way through my first draft. I'm also 4 weeks out since I submitted my book to publishers, which means I have 8 more weeks until I hear back about it. My goal is to have my current novel ready to send off by the time I hear about the one that's already out.

This has been the craziest year of my life. I've been thrown through so many loops and so many new things are happening. Have I ever been this busy before? Even when taking a full college load and working 6-10 hours a night, I don't think I was this super busy. But it's fulfilling. I'm chasing dreams and making them come true. I've been a writer for twenty years and never got far enough to actually start submitting to publishers. I always got frustrated or lost confidence or just couldn't figure out how to make it work. Now I'm writing more than I have in seven years and I should have at least two novels submitted to publishers by the end of the year, with another novel (one already written from when I was teenager) soon after that.

Plus I've always wanted a successful craft business, but lacked time, finances and marketing. I'm able to tackle it much better now than ever before, and because the craft I make really means something to me, I have a lot of motivation to keep pushing and working on it. I feel more alive now than I have in a while, because I have two amazing kids, a very supportive husband, and hobbies that are turning into money. While 2016 is still so rocky, I'm hoping that by the time 2017 rolls around, I'll be doing really well!